But it SURE is nice when I hear Leo's speech therapist rave about how he's a "perfectly normal boy." He's doing everything else normally. Hitting all his milestones. Imitating her with movement and speech. Today she called him her "poster child." He's amazing! He does everything she wants him to. He improves every week! She told me that she will write a report for his surgeon about his speech and eating. She said sometimes she gets to tell the surgeon that cleft palate babies are eating well. But, she said, Leo is a STAR. :)
So when I'm standing in the back of church holding twenty pounds of squirming chunk, I'm so grateful he's a "normal boy." When he crawls around the house putting every single little thing he finds on the floor into his mouth, even if I've just swept and vacuumed twice, I'm thankful he's a normal boy. When he screams whenever I walk out of the room he's in, say, to cook supper or go to the bathroom, that is normal for a 9 month old. And I thank God.
His surgery seems to be getting closer, although it's probably still 5-6 months away. We can get through it. He will be fine. He'll be better than fine!
And, have you ever seen a cuter baby??
I love my little Star!
15 comments:
I pray this palate issue is a small bump in what is going to continue to be a healthy and h appy little boy! He is so cute! I love his hat!
I couldn't love him more!!!
He looks so much like JP in that 2nd picture!
me too!!
Oh, he is beautiful!!! I love his little pumpkin hat for a little punkin!
He (and you) are definitely in my prayers. That will be me in a short time from now.
I have to say, I, too, catch myself thinking there could be something else wrong too. If this didn't develop, then surely there is something else--even though, the ultra sound only shows this, and otherwise a healthy baby.
We found out yesterday that our baby does have a bilateral cleft lip and palate. They don't know how much of the palate yet, just that it is showing. I've already mourned the hope of not being able to nurse now, and am ready to figure out how to get that pumping schedule ready....I won't be pumping til the hospital though, it's driving me crazy trying to figure out how to go places without just nursing my baby...I'm going to have to call you sometime!!
I wrote about it yesterday and today. I'm feeling so much better today and feel very blessed.
Your perfectly normal little boy is just beautiful!!
What a blessing!
My goodness if he were any cuter he'd be a Bubble boy!
;)
Love him!!!!!
Pure perfection!!!
My Henry is not even close to being a "perfectly normal boy"....
Who cares?
God is the only one who is perfect, the rest of us aren't even close...
I know what she was trying to say, but that mentality is what leads to aborting any "less than perfect" boys and girls...
Carls
www.bringinghenryhome.blogspot.com
He is SOOOOO dang cute I could eat him right up! Along with my little CC and her crooked little head! ha ha!!!
I know exactly what you are saying in this post, I wrote a similar one recently about C's plagiocephaly. It is not meant to convey that only "normal" babies are loved and worthy of living. Of coourse this was not the point. Celebrating his milestones is a wonderful thing to do for a mother, especially when a child has had some challenges, big or small.
Yes L is going to be just fine. We are praying for you in his surery!!!
This post was so timely! Since finding out about baby #3's clubfeet, I keep imagining lots of other problems- anything from premature birth to emergency c-section to other physical and developmental delays. I think these fears are totally irrational, but I'm glad to hear it's common!
Carla, I think it's ok for any mom to be happy her child is normal, or has "only" this or that problem. It's not a value judgement on other children, just relief at knowing the extent of the "hurdles" facing the child and parents. It's just as acceptable for a mom to rejoice in her perfectly healthy baby as it is for a mom to rejoice that her baby *only* needs plastic surgery, or *only* needs casts and braces... or for a mom to rejoice that her child is alive and beautiful, period, regardless of physical or mental problems. It is all a celebration of life.
It would be another thing if Beth qualified her love or her acceptance of Leo on his physical condition, but that is not the case at all. From the little I know her, Beth's heart is big enough to accept any child God gives her, but she is still allowed to breathe a sigh of relief when she is assured her child is healthy!
Oh Monica, of course I know Beth is rejoicing in litlke Leo's LIFE, cleft palate and all...she is an incredible woman and mom! Love'ya BethM
I was thinking though of the gal who made the comment in the first place...I do think it is a subtle judgment that our society encourages...
Cleft palates are ok if the rest of the child is "perfect"...
But what if another disability is present? How about 2 more? How about 3 more???
Would the gal still have said he is "perfect" except for items 1-5??
Couldn't she just have said"awesome" or "amazing" or "wonderful" instead of "perfect"????
I am just thinking about the implications of language such as this on our children...I have been doing google research on what syndrome Henry might have and have been horrified to read reports examining the fetuses aborted after finding out they had chromosomal abnormalities...some are "perfect" except for multiple joint abnormalities...but that was not "perfect" enough for their parents...
Beth, no offense meant toward you andvyour sweet boy and how well he is doing at all, again, just considering the implications of language regarding our differently -ablec children...thanks Monica for discussing further! Hope you are feeling well!!
Carla
www.bringinghenryhome.blogspot.com
Interesting. One of the things that MOST horrified Beth after Leo's cleft became apparent was the fact that cleft palate babies are often aborted. It brought her to tears more than once. Abortion, Beth knows, is NEVER okay, but when it slaps you across the face like that, it becomes more personal than ever.
And of course, terrible diseases and conditions aren't the only things putting babies in danger of abortion.
Merely having a vagina makes the womb incredibly dangerous for babies in many parts of the world, for instance.
When I call your baby or mine "perfect" (and that is precisely the word that jumped into my heart and out of my mouth when Beth forwarded me a pic of a preemie baby born with several problems recently), I don't mean "perfect" as society means it. I don't mean 23 pairs of chromosomes per cell or a great palate or 20/20 vision or a hole-less heart or 10 toes or tall, dark and handsome. I mean your baby is perfect. Perfect. And so is Leo. And so is Henry.
These little people remind us of what WE are supposed to be as creatures of God: humble, submissive, innocent, nothing without help.
They are perfect as God made them, more perfect than this broken sinner ever could be.
Babies.
Are.
Perfect.
Yours, and yours, and yours, and mine, and theirs, too. Every last one of them.
Beth and I have talked about how irksome it is when people say, "Girl or boy?" "Don't know." "Well, as long as it's healthy."
And we BOTH respond "NO! Not as long as it's healthy. I don't say that about my husband or my mother or my friends and I would NEVER say it about my own child. I love my child in sickness and in health."
Beth is justifiably proud of Leo's eating. She has been busting her hump to give him the best start in life and the love and care and compassion is visible. She's also proud of his curly hair and his sleep habits and his beautiful eyes and blah blah blah brag brag brag. (J/K Beth, LOL!)
He is so cute and I LOVE that hat!!!! did you make that? Oh my gosh. It is ADORABLE!!!!
What a wonderful thing to hear about your precious boy! I can imagine how one thing would make you sensitive to wondering about multiple things. Such a precious pumpkin!!!
He is so adorable, especially in that great hat!
I have a boy who is not "normal," (or typical, as we say) though a blessing just the same...or all the more, I sometimes think. I understand looking for "something else wrong," and with Simon, we're grateful for his physical health despite his developmental challenges. It seems like a miracle to me that so many babies come out with no problems, and I think Simon has made me more grateful for the times when things go right. He's also made me grateful for Joseph's on-track development, as aggravating as it sometimes may seem (tantrums, independence, crib-climbing).
God bless your little Leo! He's precious and true gift to your family.
Carla, I see what you're saying. :-)
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